Saturday, 24 May 2014

Endometriosis: An Emotional Roller Coaster

These days, you hear so many people saying they've been on a journey. Or an emotional roller coaster. The term somewhat loses its meaning. Yet when it comes endometriosis, there really is no other explanation. From one day to the next, you don't know what's around the corner. Last week I was at such a low point. I felt that all my strength had gone. I felt weak and extremely down. I even blogged about losing my faith. 

It is important to remember that tough times never last... but tough people do! A few days later, I am feeling re-energised. I'm not jumping for joy or bouncing off the walls. But I'm content. And that's a massive difference to how I felt last week. 

When these bad days pop up, they can really hit you hard. As much as you try to look for a way through the pain and darkness, it doesn't always present itself. I'm ok today but don't know what tomorrow will bring for me. I wanted to post this update so that anyone who is in a similar situation can look forward to better days. They will come. I promise. A roller coaster has highs and lows and lots of loops. But it always comes to an end. If things are not ok for you at the moment. It's not the end. Hang in there.


#MyEndoDiary

Wednesday, 21 May 2014

Endometriosis - Lacking Faith

How do you keep faith and hold onto hope when you're in so much pain?

Where do you find the strength to pick yourself back up and keep going? How do you fight through the next waves of pains? I keep asking myself these questions. Repeating them over and over again. Whispering them so quietly it's hardly a murmur. Shouting them loudly when anger takes over. It doesn't seem to matter which way, I still cant find the answers. This physical and emotional roller coaster has had too many twists and turns for me. Can I just get off? I'd much rather a go on the merry go round, the swings or anything else but this.

I sometimes feel like the help I am looking for is completely out of my reach. Faith is believing things will get better, even when you may not be able to see it. In times of darkness, deep down, you just know better things will come. Faith eludes me at the moment. However, my hope remains. One tiny sliver of hope. A wish. I hope and wish on every bad day that I'll find some faith. Faith which will give me the courage and wisdom that I'm so desperately needing. I'm constantly hoping to find relief from pain. Always hoping for better days.

Never take away someone's hope. It may be all they have.

#MyEndoDiary